I'm fucking pissed at my intolerance to recent experiences in meeting people and hanging out with them, and inspiring people to get moving in a fun, expressive, balanced way.. But I'm a fucking bastard and haven't tried as hard in the direct ways I know I should.. Like emailing that UU church for starting a class, or getting more people to come dance in the park with me.. but I know, I KNOW that they will come, if slowly, I will be the ubermensch, the leader, the Moses to a revolution of movement when I put my goddamn discipline into it!!! It is for good. To express the masculine and feminine. To balance through environment and context. The current college environment is polarized like much of the US, to shitty phone attachment, goddamn spoonfed and regurgitated conceptions of social justice, happiness, sex and suc-cess. Man. Woman, y'all just gotta recognized how you're being played, then fight back. I'll show ya :)
Simply put:
I'm having a weird social anxiety, social media checking, expecting kinda feel with a whopping side of misunderstanding of my life goals.. I want to clarify it, clarify my interests... all very masculine things, powerful things to instate. However, I feel like it's hard for me to break through that over-polarized liberal wall of sulking as a man and waiting for the good to come rather than going out and getting it. I will. School hasn't started yet, and my work is just getting started. I know what I have to do.
