Coming back

I really wanted to post more this spring break, but the circumstances in which I had drafted some posts changed, with me being pulled away from publishing mid-post.

I don't like to leave something halfway.  No one does.  But life is so busy, so dynamic, so hectic and just chaotic at times.  We often don't know how to control ourselves let alone the wide world.

I believe thoughts sometimes need time to turn around in our head.  Not everything can be done at once.  But it's a constant busyness which can help keep us purposed towards some good.

But these things we want to do will stay in our minds.  They don't just erode.  They are planted, and if we cultivate them, little by little, they will grow.  Relationships, builds, projects, the grandest systems we wish to implement for a better, more efficient and enjoyable life down to the very basic simple ideas.

I saw Inception the other day with my half awake mother (wonder what she was dreaming), and it was really thought provoking watching it for a second time since it was released in 2010 (damn, human, time flies).  The idea of a foreign or created idea being the most infectious and least defendable thing in a human mind as brought up from the very start of the movie, is an extremely profound notion.  It takes a full understanding for it to manifest its ultimate power, but to get there and create, and pass on new ideas is just an awesome capability that I don't think we can argue against.  Passing them on may be the hard part, or rather is it the building up of the ideas into something understandable that's hardest?

We will come back to these thoughts, ideas, things and people.  There's time and space. But even if we never fully understand what we wanted to in the beginning, we can try to pass these ideas on before we leave this Earth. Hope it will continue to grow and flow.  And feel happy with the work we started.

I don't know when I will come back to you, but I will.  In this life, I will still feel the emptiness of unanswered questions which drive me towards good.  The pile of books to read, texts left without texts back, and tasks left in limbo.  After this life, I will come back someway.  If not physically, oh I'll find a way for my dust to make you sneeze. If not mentally, oh I'll find a way to make you think of what I left behind.  If you question my impact, I've just impacted you.  And that's  how I will come back.

Grant
ing you good thoughts

Spring ing (in the slowness of time lived enthusiastically in moments, this is a throwback)

Composed March 9, Throwback post, posted it and apparently it disappeared, but it's never too late.

spring air
do you dare?
finding it fair
emerge from lair!
spring air

So, the Spring could be "defined"(ugh definitions, keep your pen and paper away) as "when it's less cold", but also I swear the blossoming of many little flowering trees must accumulate to orchestrate the alluring air quality and smell that is apparent every spring. Same thing in the fall when the leaves decay, the air seems so crisp, and that is why the spring and fall are two of my most beloved seasons - for their distinct atmosphere.

I also swear this spring fling for the senses is unsettling in a chaotically confounding manner - whether it gets you excited to get out of 4 hour Biology lab, or makes you sad as you drive by the bustling park of joggers and walkers, or it beckons you as you sit inside, window cracked to get a tease of the air. It just seems that despite the peaceful opening of nature outside, that some infiltration of unrest occurs from the very moment this air finds our noses and insides. Is this not accurately applied to everyone this time?  Maybe you've been on canned O2 this whole time, and I'm talking to myself?  But have you compared the inside and outside air?  Taken some breaths, presently in each?

Or maybe it's the solar eclipse yesterday that apparently has us all astronomically disturbed? http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2016/03/09/solar-eclipse-alaska-airlines-flight/81544816/ I don't quite think that is the entire reason if at all.  Honestly, maybe it's that I am thinking about what it is.  But that doesn't take away from just the sheer awesomeness of what I have breathed.

Just. Go.  GO. Go breathe it.  Do stuff outside.  My favorite thing is listening to the trees in the wind.  It is deeply assuring.  Next level is to climb it in the wind and feel the tree move with it.  But be careful, have the fire department on call if you're too scared to land on all fours.. Just kidding.

If you read my last post, you'll know what to do (trick suggestion).

n joy
Grant

On Being and Perhaps Descriptively, Perceiving

Busy, stressed, overworked, emotional, and simply too much.  Our days can be like this.  They can also be like this: lazy, unproductive, procrastinating, depressed and really empty-feeling.  I'm sure even some of the most well-rounded people who we look up to as pillars of strength and unwavering dignity experience days or moments that seem endlessly torturous like this.  People are emotional, if not perceptively stagnant.  We often have a set focus on the environment around us, and if not, we are setting that focus in our worried brains and minds.

We are often told to relax, to see it as if there could be something worse, or just tough it out.  This doesn't seem to work with everyone.  These emotions and the emphasis that your mind gives your thoughts are legitimate psychological processes with the power to really halt many other rational considerations.  I'm sure we've all noticed what kinds of recklessness we can have when we are angry, or what kinds of beautiful things we fail to appreciate when we're sad - and it is totally natural. 

But there are ways to condition ourselves to control our emotions better, not totally of course. Realistically, we can do that. Consider the following by David Foster Wallace.

http://www.metastatic.org/text/This%20is%20Water.pdf

Now, it takes effort to be self and world aware.  It surely seems worth it.  We can likely agree that most people in the U.S. allow their emotions to take control in many situations to their own disadvantage, often wasting plenty of energy.  If it also takes constant energy to also be self and world aware, then why should we even change our emotionally eruptive ways?  One could argue that we will become more efficient at managing our emotions, but one could also argue that overtime, our un-managed emotional eruptions also will lessen in their impact on us.  Surely they may effect others negatively more and more though.

Anyways, I find these proposed arguments silly, but I want you to understand these considerations so that you can ask what is worth managing?  Your emotions, energies, awareness?  Well, I think one of the greatest solutions is not giving a flying f%$& sometimes.  In layman terms of a docile style, "letting go" - of all energies spent on trying to see from their perspectives, trying to manage your emotions or just letting go of your emotions themselves, to not just relax, but totally stop.  There is a massive difference between trying and letting.  You will also find that those who let, often will effortlessly be more aware to begin with.  So it can take effort, or not, depending on how you do it - try or let.

It is this availability of options, a balance really, which I believe we often forget about in our Western culture.  A good friend and yoga teacher of mine recently studied Hinduism abroad in India, and truly enjoyed their easy-goingness, compassion, and disregard for things many Westerners would find appalling: rituals to stand in cow dung for better health, people urinating off the sides of the streets, the stench, lots of "dirty" things one might describe these as.  These people see the value, or perhaps necessity, in these things over the physical exterior that we can often overlook. Also, I can guarantee you the sacred Indian cows are much healthier than most cows kept in America for agricultural or petting zoo purposes, so there may also be a difference in whose dung you stand in, before you try it. 

Anyways, if we simply let go, if we just let ourselves BE... Just don't do anything, just breathe for a little.  See, it's calm, it's another of our natural states.  It's like freedom.

We might come to some great realizations without using any energy. We have alot to do nowadays, but we should really let go of more, rather than reach for more.  Simply let this.  There's nothing to do.  Be careful what setting in which you let go in: I let go of my will when I was vomiting painfully last week, and found myself had passed out in the vomit minutes later.  If I was face up, I could easily have choked and died. I happily did not perish. But when you are safe, even if you don't think you have time to, sometimes letting will make a better use of your time.  For my study breaks recently I have implemented a 15 minute timer and doing absolutely nothing, sometimes listening to music, being immersed in a busy environment, but I just let things be when I am there.  It may seem counter intuitive, but if you look at the battle you are fighting, the concept of a Sabbath, the wisdom of our elders and often counterparts reminding us of the need to rest, then you will see you have much more to fight with when you grab hold of life again.  Balance between trying and letting, and your battles will become that much easier.

hello all!

This blog has been created with a free intent to share, create, develop and divide many and nearly any ideas of philosophical, natural, spiritual, material, political, social inquiries and to be a tool for great consideration-making with regards to whatever content finds its way here and on our minds.  

The title, "flowerssence" reflects words with great meanings, but also intercrossings of words and their relations to each other, and to you.  I am deeply interested in meditations on vastly interpreted creations, such as human art and nature.  I will not divulge what it means to me, but I would like you to pursue what it does for you.  So every time you visit, please meditate with us as a universal human community on the many ways there exist within our imaginations and our perceptions :) 

And lastly, I would like to introduce myself as Grant, a human being of the United States of the Planet Earth of the Universe, and of our human understanding to be so.  I love participating in Obstacle Course Racing as a volunteer and in elite races, and I love the social and mental challenges I navigate at Rutgers University.  I am planning to major in Philosophy and Applied Kinesiology, Philosophy being my love, the science of Applied Kinesiology an interest, adding to my love of physical free movement and action. I also am strongly inclined to serve in the United States Navy after my years at RU, for the raw experience, and as a projection of my confidence in doing for others. 

Ralph Waldo Emerson is a benefactor of inspiration to me, as my stepfather, a wonderful philospher and philosophy professor with plethoras of texts, gave me Emerson's essays just two years ago before starting at RU.  Since reading him, many of the feelings and attitudes I had seemed so easily expressed within his writing.  His writings (and living) were to me so much about a spirited, enthuasiastic, yet refining experiential way of thinking, and consequently doing.  So I find it appropriate to give due thanks to Emerson, as well as and especially: my family, friends, environments, accidents and miracles for getting me to seek a way to express, experience, and absorb all the awe around us :)

very respectfully and sincerely,
grant
(a name: greater than a definition)